8:48 PM — You young whipper-snappers! Sound effect: phone ringing

Me: Hello?

Telemarketer: Hello, is your mother or father in?

Telemarketer has an old, grandfathery, gravely voice, with an accent somewhere between a southern drawl and Irish lilt.

Me: (indignant) I'm 26 years old.

Telemarketer: Oh, I'm sorry! You sounded like you were 11! You'll be glad of that when you're 90.

both laugh

Me: I'm afraid I'm not that glad of it when I'm trying to get a job.

Telemarketer: (pauses) I'm with the Fraternal Order of Police...

Me: I presume you're fundraising?

Telemarketer: Yessiree, we help to fund firefighters--

Me: (still chuckling) Well, since I sound too young to get a job, I'm afraid I don't have much money to contribute.

Telemarketer: What sort of job are you trying to get?

Me: Astronomy

Telemarketer: Astronomy?

Me: Yep! (extra emphasis on the "P")

Telemarketer: I'm not sure what jobs there are in Astronomy.

Me: Exactly. (pause, then cheery) So I'm sorry I can't help, have a good evening.

Telemarketer: You too, and good luck with the jobs!

Me: And good luck fundraising!

Those guys from the Fraternal Orders of Police and Firefighters invariably make me laugh. I should donate some money just for that alone. Better than a stand-up, and no two drink minimum!  ¶ permalink | 0 musings